in coffee i trust

click to view my portfolio

today, i finally got around to editing the plethora of pictures i have from recent (and past) shoots that were left pretty much untouched since loading them into my laptop. i definitely have to credit, and thank, the caffeine god for the day's productivity--i even got around to updating my cargocollective account with (properly sized) images of mimi and adding another folder for gee. i also have to thank melissa de mata--if it weren't for her indirect guidance i wouldn't have known about this awesome website. i've been searching for a while to find a place i can neatly display my photos for everyone to see. now, voila! hope you guys enjoy looking through these and yes, i'll be adding more. :)

i've been pretty inspired lately and i can't wait to execute the ideas i have for future shoots!

existence

because we're all stardust,

amazing beings of light that

carry with us the imprint of

our emotions and the love

we fill our hearts with.

because we're a connected

network of subconsciousness

who can move through mountains

with just the sheer power of our minds.

and because we are energy,

unable to be created, destroyed--

only displaced--and if the spark

of our soul goes out then soon

you will find another one

shining brighter than the last.

eye of horus

i started my fifty-two self-portrait series today,

one self-portrait for every week of the year.

my obsession for the eye of horus manifested itself

inside me again as i revisited egyptian mythology.

i've also begun to find makeup very fascinating...

just checking in

hiyo! hope january has been treating everyone well.

everything is amazing here on my end, it's been a very

rewarding and inspiring month so far--i'm feeling really good!

flashback

every now and then, i look back on all my 

old writing as a form of visitation to the past.

i do it, sometimes, to remind myself of

all the things i've went through, good and bad.

or i do it, more often than not, to see whether or not my

demons of old still affect me in the same way that they used to..

it's a bit masochistic but it helps me to deal, helps me to be a little more

apathetic to the things that wounded or scarred me.

but mostly i do it to compare how much time

either changed me or kept me the same.

this morning, i entertained my urge to look into

an old wordpress account of mine, an account

i had actively written in during darker times and

freely used as a form of therapy and outlet

for my frustrations and..wait for it..heartbreak.

re-reading all the posts--public, private and password protected,

i was a little struck by the nakedness of my words.

raw emotions. so many strings of words put together

by everything i was feeling--pure and unfiltered.

it's quite amazing how all that was translated into writing.

i don't write as much as i should like to anymore,

and i feel that my writing would never be the same as it once was.

it makes perfect sense as to why that is--i'm not driven by

a slew of such passionate emotions and i've already come to terms

with the fact that i am a better writer when influenced by tragedy..

but i can't help but to wonder if that was something i just pigeon-holed myself in.

like crispy pata

feeling pretty burnt out today.

skater boys

yesterday i ended up locking myself out of my apartment

when my friend noah and tony came to pick me up for some coffee

over at the bourgeois pig in my neighborhood (coffee & $1 pool games?!).

guess i got too excited to see a couple of old friends, haha.
it was a nice surprise when a couple more joined us later in the day.

flickr

finally using this after sitting on it for a couple of years.

hi all, i'm starting a 365!

my friend catherine

hair

I never understood why the majority of females are so attached to their hair. It's obvious from the picture above (that's only during 2009 to 2012!) that I am very fickle with my own locks, and gathering from my many hair posts on this here blog you can tell that I am also very impatient with the process of growing it out. Now that I think about it, I guess it's because of the fact that my mom was studying cosmetology when I was younger. Growing up, I've had perms, pixie cuts, bobs, waves, streaks, highlights...I was my mom's living, breathing hair mannequin--maybe that shaped my hair-fickle ways. The fact that I have very thick and heavy hair probably added onto it as well; I'd often be plagued with massive headaches due to the weight of my hair, especially during hot weather. In any case, I have no hesitation when it comes to haircuts. If anything, it's a tendency if mine to cut my hair pixie-short after growing it out for a year or two. Honestly, it's a pretty exhilarating feeling! I absolutely love taking risks with my physical appearance.

2KAY13

Without fail, I'm late with my New Year's greeting yet again. Think I've pretty much made it somewhat of a tradition--it ain't New Year's if Hannah isn't missing from the family get-together of dduk-gook (to gain another year full of luck) and Sae-bae dohn (the juhl included). Seems I'm not doing much to ease that filial guilt that plagues me. What am I gonna do with myself?

And yes, my guilt grows deeper with the fact that I rang in the New Year indulging in the same, almost-abandoned vice of mine and that I really missed the family tradition because I was reeling from the after affects of the damned thing. Heck, I guess I've been served a poetic justice since I spent this whole week in the fetal position with my head next to the trash can and my stomach unhesitant to empty itself of its contents. Way to go, cosmic energies of the universe. I applaud you. *claps hands slowly*

BUT, even though I rang in 2013 in similar fashion of 2011, I have a strong sense of faith in myself. I've neglected my self-discipline and indomitable spirit (국기백절불굴!) that I prided myself so much for--it's high time I got off my lazy, unmotivated ass to finally do the things I love and can't live without!

2012 was a year of passivity and stand-still. I can't believe I really wasted three hundred and sixty-five days of just barely going through the motions--fucking pathetic!

2KAY13. It's cliché as fuck when people exclaim that the new year will be theirs, but that's how I feel about this one. A new chapter in my life, a fresh start, a chance to reinvent myself and fill its blank pages with many more memories and experiences.

I don't believe in resolutions, so I'm just going to say this: let this year be a year full of travel. Of taking risks. Of being fearless. Of following my heart and ignoring my over-analytical head. And of course, let this year be full of love, joy, friends and laughter!

Oh, well, I guess I do have one resolution this year. GET MY DRIVER'S LICENSE BEFORE FEBRUARY!

So happy New Year's, everyone! I hope this year is filled with amazing adventures for each and every one of you.