music off, world on

lately, i've been trying out this new thing called "let's leave the ipod at home" while going about my daily commutes. for those of you who use public transportation as a means to get around (due to having no license, no car, etc), you can all agree that having earphones in your ears is the best way to avoid human contact. the world turns into a tv on mute and your sense of hearing is filled with whatever it is you're plugged into. as i've started leaving my ipod behind, i've come to realize just how much we big city folk have grown nonchalant to our surroundings and especially to the people around us. we also have this appalling ability to see right through other human beings, as if they weren't standing right in front of us at all.

it's been about a month since i've abandoned the act of willingly deafening my ears (because, after all, that's exactly what we're doing), soaking up the sounds of the city and the array of culture that walks, breathes, and lives along with me in this amazing city of Los Angeles (along with the many neighboring cities I trek to with my bus card and feet).

i guess i can also say that i've traded in music for words--i've started to really enjoy reading again, after neglecting so many unread books that i've filled my shelves with. just because i started to live life, and thoroughly enjoy it, doesn't mean i shouldn't indulge myself with fiction :)

happy halloween

xo, peterpan & tinkerbell

metamorphosis

maybe one day,
when dust begins to settle
on those memories, finally
stored in the back of my
restless and masochistic mind,
maybe then i'll feel more
beautiful and more worthy
of being here than i really do
in this moment.

maybe one day,
and i hope it's soon,
i'll break free from
this suffocating chrysalis
i've no real idea of how
to rip apart, to shed away.

no, not maybe.
i refuse to rot inside here,
i'm much more determined
now to tear away at this
heavy skin and finally
unfold my wings.

the answer

i'm absolutely obsessed with die antwoord.

they didn't really stick out to me when i first

came across "rich bitch" a year or two ago but

i recently came across "fatty boom boom" and

fucking wow dude.

i

am

OBSESSED.

and, i know, i know.

i'm into some weird shit.

party at the crib

housewarming potluck.

shit is gonna get real, real soon.

making baked pasta with cream cheese

and a cake--i'm so domesticated, whoowhoo

only a fool

those days were
blackened out
and your presence
was only felt through
good morning texts and
phone calls bidding
good nights.

where you were
was just a blur,
it didn't matter,
i didn't want to
wonder, to care.

i was left alone,
with newfound truths
and well-discovered
instances, left alone
with torturous thoughts
of your hands,
her hips,
her breasts,
your lips,
her bed and
the cold you left
in my own.

in those moments,
i swore you were
dead to me,
nothing but a
passing memory,
a lesson, proof of
how weak i can be.

in those moments,
your lies became
transparent,
and i a fool,
gullible and so
willing to forsake
my own reason for
a veneer of security
those three words
provided.

but those moments
of fleeting wisdom
were abolished
from my mind
as soon as
your name appeared
on the screen of my phone.

androgyny

who dat bwoyee?

samson and delilah

i loved running my fingers
through your raven hair,
my hands swimming
in the waves it curled itself into,
far more beautiful than
my own head of
tangled, straight mess.
it's a little unfair that you were
blessed with better hair than me--
what did a man need with a
pretty mane, anyway?
i loved the way those
shiny curlicues cascaded
down your shoulders,
but much like them you seemed
to swim in a current only
you knew the flow of.
you were like my own samson,
but instead of strength it was
heartbreak you gave me,
and to make you mine
i had to become delilah.

korean pride

FIRST. EVER. DAY. &. DATE. KOREA. &. USA. RELEASE.

why did i just find out about this?! duuuuuuude, i'm way too stoked right now.

this is a great fucking year for korea, i love it!

debate night

this picture is from last night, at the PCC campus center. it got pretty packed for the first of two presidential debates this year and though i was only able to watch the first thirty minutes of it, it was very interesting. i didn't really want to go to class, haha. now, i'm not as political as i once was, and i haven't been keeping my eye on the political weather as much as i used to (ex-political science major here), but that doesn't mean i'm not keen on what's going on. election day is right around the corner and though i don't believe our votes really count for much (anyone know what the electoral college is?), and it's true i've lost a lot of faith in our system of government (down with capitalism!) but after what i've been hearing/reading on mitt romney (and seeing him on that jumbo screen last night), i couldn't help but to laugh (really, republicans? why do your candidates get more and more evasive and more dense every presidential race?). i wasn't really planning on voting, but after watching a bit of the debate last night, i think i just might have to contribute.

but imagine, just imagine, that no one voted in this country? just imagine that everyone was just so fed up with the way things are and where they seem to be going, that not a single person voted, as a form of uprise against the current state of government? that...i think that would be the most astounding thing to witness and be a part of.