Saturday, July 30, 2011


it's been a while since i've turned the camera towards myself,
i'm not much of a picture-posing person & i'd rather stay behind the camera.

but that doesn't mean i don't have a camera-whore streak ;)
when i first started out, my subject matter of choice, of course, was me, and then i grew up out of that.
even though every now and then i'll entertain what little vanity i have.

Monday, July 25, 2011


5. Five things that irritate you about the opposite sex/same sex.

i'm a pretty amiable person.
i like everyone. i get along with everyone.
i'm tolerant of a lot of things and i'm respectful.

it's hard to piss me off, hard to annoy me, hard to get me to dislike you.


but proceed to have these five qualities and you'll get the look i'm giving you via photobooth pic above.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

little red corvette.

i've been given the chance to direct/style a music video that's influenced by this song.
but, it's a good song nonetheless. besides, who wouldn't love a little prince in their lives?
(the vulgar and sexual prince of the eighties, not the recently reformed jehovah's witness prince)

i'm excited about this project/opportunity that knocked at my door.
although i've shot little videos for my own enjoyment, this'll be a definite first.

hopefully i can translate all my ideas successfully, lol.

Monday, July 18, 2011


4. What you wear to bed.

Usually I just wear a shirt/tank top and panties to bed.
Tonight, I'll be under the covers with my Wonder Woman shirt & purple Hanes.

Saturday, July 16, 2011


send over a picture of your best "face" to & win goodies!

"oh"-face, thizz face, duck face, mad face, sad face,
burnt face, stoked face, shocked face, sexy face,
mean-mugger face, jealous face, cute face, etc

what's yours?

Friday, July 15, 2011

anti-insomnia & retro cameras.

I've been given many gifts this month and I've very thankful for them and the friends who have shown me love. 

The cover reads: "I CAN'T SLEEP, A journal for passing the time when insomnia strikes and my brain is circling in on itself, cannibalizing the trivialities of the day and exaggerating the ticking of the clock, reminding me that every minute spent awake is another minute closer to when I'll have to get up, though many of the great artists and sages were insomniacs and that's part of how they got so much done, so if I can't sleep I might as well write and channel my misery into something productive."

I want to thank Melissa de Mata for the journal she gave me when we met for the first time this Tuesday. It's a journal to write in whenever my archenemy insomnia (oh, how familiar a-face you are) strikes and I'm absolutely in love with it. I was kind of shocked since I came across it online and kind of pined for it and then BAM! She hands it to me after a hug over at Campos before we headed to Gyu Kaku.

If you guys didn't know, Miss de Mata is a fellow writer and photographer, and SF editor, of Light Meets Night. I actually wouldn't have been added to the team if it weren't for her (and yes, I just met her, after many text messages, LMN Skype meetings and phone conversations). For that, I thank her, and for the journal I am so grateful. As I've told you before, expect something from me very soon!

clam chowder & challenge 003.

I know, I know, I'm really bad at updating. I'm trying to balance out my life, work, passions, blogging,'s very apparent that I'm not doing a very good job at it. But, fret not, for here I am! Even though I believe that never late is better, well, it's better late than never. (Thanks, Drake.) Anyway, I see that Blogger's done a little bit of sprucing up regarding its image. Can't say I like it very much but I guess that's because I'm just not used to it. And am I the only one who thinks Google+ is kind of...unnecessary? Maybe it's because I'm getting old and Facebook is just that great, but I don't think another social networking site is really needed. Maybe if it was a super improved version of the current top-social networking site (Facebook), but I think Facebook pretty much has everything going on for it (we can even Skype through Facebook chat??!! Dope).

Moving on.

I love my roommate, Steven! I was craving a sourdough bread bowl clam chowder (from Fisherman's Wharf in San Francisco, of course) really bad and tweeted about it. I come home yesterday and BAM! I had a can of Chunky's Clam Chowder waiting for me in the kitchen, courtesy of my French Vietnamese roommate.

I love the people I live with. I'm seriously so lucky to live with my close friends & my lover.

Thursday, July 7, 2011


2. How have you changed in the past 2 years?

Let's see...two years ago it was 2009. I was still at home, still living with my parents and little brother, still in school, still motivated, running my own music blog, going to a ton of shows, religiously going to my interships, religiously writing. I went out to eat a lot, hung out with friends a lot, had fewer tattoos and a lot more money than I do now. Right now, I'm at a standstill, I'm much more mellowed out, I'm in a relationship (who would have thought?), I have more responsibilities, I work a lot but don't work enough, I eat two meals a day at the most...

I'm struggling, much more than I would like to, but I'm not mad because I'm gaining experience and wisdom as the days go by.

Sunday, July 3, 2011


1. Weird things you do when you're alone.

I do quite a number of weird things when I'm alone, or feel like no one is looking. I dance in front of the just my underwear. I sing and record it on my phone (voice notes) in the bathroom. I kind of talk to myself, sometimes. I use my hair as a moustache. I watch porn. But I don't masturbate. I think masturbation is...awkward.

I think that's it.

Friday, July 1, 2011


a deep breath.

i've been silent about the things that interest me, a little reluctant to engage in things that make me happy and, in truth, i've stayed away from them for a little while. i didn't want anything to do with my interests, that held many similarities with another, and i started to hate myself for them. it's hard when you want to forget about a certain heartbreaking situation while simultaneously knowing so much about the other characters of the story. that was my problem. that i knew too much. too much detail about something i ultimately didn't want to know that much about. but it came my way. a complete spillage of past due truths and i was drowning in it.

when something like that happens, you can't help but to sit and analyze all the events that's occurred back then up until now. you can't help but to sit and wonder why certain actions were done, if they were made due to this reason or that, was that a lie, a half-truth, or a nicer version? you can't help but to sit and be in awe of the workings of another's mind, how could they do that, what were they thinking, why was there no visible flinching pang of conscience? and then you can't help but to sit there and compare anything and everything. the analyzing and attempts to filter out the lies from good intentions, those are things i can go about with my sanity intact but the comparisons, oh, that's what drove me to the brink of sheer and utterly tragic insanity.

but then, all that being said, everything can only go so far. how much longer can i keep asking the same questions? how much longer can i wonder about the things that i ultimately won't know about? how much longer can i keep victimizing myself, pushing myself closer and closer to self-loathing and resentment? that's not going to get me anywhere. yet, that's always been my problem. letting go of the past is a huge lesson i still have to learn.

now, sitting here, after all the questions were asked, after all my questions have been answered, after many conversations upon it and after many subtle yet snide remarks (from yours truly), i'm down to two decisions.

dwell and damage or move forward and grow.

and, sitting here, after all has been said and done, after showing so much emotion, after all my efforts in trying to understand, and after many shared dreams, i've made my choice.

i'm moving on. i'm letting go. of everything. of everything that's happened, every single detail, every single lie, every single truth, every hurt. forgiving came easy but forgetting is always the hardest part. i'm not forgetting, no, i don't think i'll ever completely forget, but where would always remembering take me?

i'm slowly picking up the pieces. i'm almost getting there. i've dwelled on many things and have damaged myself many times. but i don't want to do that anymore. i don't want to drive myself into regrettably losing everything.

so, here's to me. here's to you. here's to us. here's to us moving forward. and here's to us growing together.

and here's to me breathing a little bit better.

the thirty day challenge.

Thought it'd be fun to do this. Will start tomorrow. =)